Incest and the Family - Incestous relationships and Inbreeding

[DaughterUK]

As some of you might know, I belong to a very tiny minority of people, I am incestuous. I've been in a relationship with my father for the last seven years, and have never been happier in my life. During this time I have visited many 'incest sites', most of which are crude and vulgar in nature, owing to the fact that they are in fact add-on forums to porn sites.

Initially I used these forums to find others like myself, who are in loving and dedicated relationships, and I still use such forums for this purpose. However, I, like many others, have grown tired of the pornography, and tired of the bull it inspires in those who visit such sites for masturbational purposes.

The genuine incest community is in a continual state of diaspora. I am attempting to unite this community in my own forum, the be a voice of reason amongst all of the nonsense. My forum is the one place where any incestuous person can go without having to come face to face with vile and insulting pornographic ads, or even worse, pedophiles pretending to be incestuous.

I am in this sense, an activist within my own community. I am a uniting force, and a voice of reason in the wildnerness. Somebody has to do it, and since nobody else was, I thought it might as well be me. I actively speak out against nonsense on other forums, I give advice, and I welcome genuine people onto my forum. We might be different from the mainstream, but we have our dignity and our integrity, no amount of hate from the non-incestuous world can remove this from us.

I want others to understand us, because ultimately, if we are ever to be accepted we have to build bridges, we have to explain ourselves to the masses. Obviously we cannot yet do this offline, and so our campaign must initially be online.

For this reason, I offer you an essay which I posted onto my own forum. I realize that they were initially written for my online brothers and sisters, but I believe that by viewing this essay you may too have a glimpse at the challenges we face both online and offline. Know that I do not expect you all to agree with me, I ask only that you hear me out.
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Answering the Tough Questions

Introduction

This article is intended primarily to address the various questions that non-incestuous people must be wondering about us. If our people do not adequately answer these important questions then there is no hope of us being understood, and thus no hope of our relationships becoming legal.
As we know, society by and large views incest as wrong. In times gone by this was because of the known negative effect of inbreeding. In the modern era, incest is often confused with pedophilia, or deemed as being inherently abusive in itself. Our task is to prove once and for all to the non-incestuous populus that they have got it all wrong. This means answering the tough questions that society eventually will ask once we are in a suitable position to protest for our equal rights.

Incest and family dynamics

Many non-incestuous people will undoubtedly believe that incest upsets the dynamic of the family. They will argue that there is a conflict of interest between the normal family role, and the role of lover. Though this argument will be levied against all incestuous people, it will be especially levied against parent/offspring couples in which joe public will believe that there is an inherent power imbalance rendering the relationship unhealthy. In normal family situations, your siblings are your friends and close confidantes, your parents are your friends and the persons who help to guide you through life by giving advice.

Of course, the usual family roles do not magically disappear simply because there is now a romantic connection. For the incestuous couple, this means that there are two roles to consider, and that those roles must be in peacefully coexistence for the relationship to be considered functional and healthy.

Over my many years in the incest community, I have read about literally hundreds of people claiming to have been in incestuous relationships. While some of the stories I have read online have been about as real as the tooth fairy, there have been just enough real people in order for me to draw logical conclusions on this subject. There is a balance between the family role and the lovers role. The two people involved don't stop being family and start being lovers, they must learn to be both to each other, striking the right balance which works for them. Exactly where this balance lies will undoubtedly be a little different for each couple, but the balance exists.

Now I will address the issue of role balancing in cross-generational incest, as this is an issue which will concern our non-incestuous brethren the most. The role of a parent is to nurture and to guide, this role is perceived by the public as being in direct conflict with the role of lover in which both parties are equal to each other. I would argue that the roles are only in direct conflict if the offspring concerned is still in need of parental guidance. It stands to reason that in light of this, the overwhelming majority of people in their mid-teens should not become sexually active with their parents (the only exceptions would be when the family dynamic is so far removed from normality that one of the parents is actually on equal footing with his or her offspring due to the tyranny of the other parent). This said, once somebody has reached emotional maturity and stands financially separate from the parent, then there is no reason why the roles should be in conflict. The parenting job by this point has already been done, and the couple are on an equal footing. In non-incestuous situations, the parent and offspring will naturally form a friendship where all parties are equal. For this reason I argue that cross-generational incest can be just as healthy as mono-generational incest.

Incest and the Pedophile Predators

It is unfortunate, but the general public has confused incest with pedophilia. This is because whenever incest is mentioned in the media, it is typically when a grown man or woman has molested one of their own children.

I therefore must reinforce the fact that the two are completely seperate issues. Incest is sex between two people who are closely related by blood. Pedophilia is a psychiatric condition in which an adult is sexually attracted to pre-pubescent children. Pedophilia itself has nothing to do with incest, although some pedophiles do molest their own children. This has to do with ease of access to their victims, it is easier to molest their own kids than it is to molest the neighbours kids.

Child molesters are scum, end of story. Nobody wants to associate with them, and that 'nobody' includes the incest community.

Incest and Inbreeding

This is another issue that non-incestuous people will be concerned about. As we know from biology, breeding with one of close kin dramatically increases the probability of there being an unhealthy child. This is because every individual carries a number of defective recessive genes, but as long as the person has a healthy dominant copy of the gene, then the person will not have any of the illness with which the defective gene is associated. When two people are closely related and they breed, the increase in risk of a congenital disorder is due to the likelihood of the offspring getting two copies of the same defective gene. The more closely related the two people, the greater the risk of congenital abnormalities.

This issue will not go away by us pretending that the risks are not that much larger than for the general population. We can't bury our heads in the sand over this one. I believe that it is absolutely vital for incestuous couples to take responsibility in this matter and get some reliable contraception. Simply using a condom will not do, condoms can split and have a roughly 97% effectiveness rate. Using the pill or the contraceptive injection is a far better option. Getting sterilized is also an option in a long-term incestuous relationship.

I would argue that for incestuous couples who are intending to conceive, genetic counseling should be sought first at the very least. Once humanity has gained enough scientific knowledge, it might even be appropriate for incestuous couples to have a child by the egg and sperm both being checked by specialists who then combine the healthy DNA from both parents to ensure that the child does not come out defective. Until that time, the answer is DO NOT BREED.

In countries where incest is legal, it might be possible for a couple to adopt a child. There is unfortunately a lot of children in the world who are unwanted and unloved. I see nothing wrong with an incestuous couple giving such a child a loving home.

Legal Incest and the Probable Impact on Society

One of the popular anti-incest arguments is that if incest is legalized, then it would result in more people engaging in it. I find this argument flawed, because it begins with the assumption that loads of people want incestuous relationships. In truth most people DON'T want to have sexual relations with family members. So in this light legalization will not result in half of the population suddenly becoming involved in incest.

It is my belief that the only thing that would happen if incest were to be legalized across the globe is that the law would stop persecuting us as a minority. The taboo against incest would still be there, just as the taboo against homosexuality is still there. Making homosexuality legal didn't suddenly change peoples views or make them any less homophobic.

Overall, there is reason to believe that the impact that legalizing incest would have on society would be minimal. The impact it would have on us incestuous people would be dramatic, we would no longer have to live in fear of being locked up for our love.

Conclusion

Society will have these questions for us and probably several more. We must be prepared to answer these questions honestly if we are to make any real progress. Consider this essay a starting point on forming those answers. Everything I have written here is the truth to the best of my knowledge and perception. I base everything here on what I've observed over the years within the community, and my personal experience.
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Well, there is my essay. I hope that you found it informative and enlightening. Please know that I am willing to answer any questions you might have either publicly or via PM. I was intending to post two essays, but I will need to send the second one separately because the forum software won't let me post so much at once.

We're a diverse group of people; we come from many backgrounds, many cultures, many religions, many nations, and many social groups. Though the public has their stereotypes of us, we are not anything like the monsters we are perceived to be, in fact the genuine community are quite the opposite. We endure much to be with our family lovers, we have to put up with conditions that would test even the most stable of non-incestuous relationships. Yet in the end, it is worth it for love.

All I want is for us to be understood, and I am willing to write for the minority I belong to... to be a pioneer in the sense of building those initial bridges which will be built upon and strengthened through the generations. My passion is equal rights for those of us who fall in love with a family member. Nothing more and nothing less.

DaughterUK

Wow I googled "I want to have incest" and found your post. I love the post good job. Glad to see I'm not alone haha. I would love to join the little group you talk of.

[Musk]

This is a very good piece of writing 'Daughteruk'. Your essay on this delicate issue is highly appreciated!! Believe me, you have made a friend here straight away.You mustn't stop getting your point across!! l wait for your second piece of writing!!

[boboyt]

equal rights yea you'll probably get them eventually because one of your freaky friends will get into some political office and then you'll have em. then they'll have incest shows on tv polluting the minds of children. this is not something to be proud of. sickening to think of u and your dad. i know you've heard this a hundred times from a lot of people. i don't know how to get through to anyone on the internet you cant express feelings. man omg.

[DaughterUK]

Originally Posted by boboyt

equal rights yea you'll probably get them eventually because one of your freaky friends will get into some political office and then you'll have em. then they'll have incest shows on tv polluting the minds of children. this is not something to be proud of. sickening to think of u and your dad. i know you've heard this a hundred times from a lot of people. i don't know how to get through to anyone on the internet you cant express feelings. man omg.

I'm sorry that you feel that way, but it's your right to feel however you want about this issue. As for me and dad, we live as a normal couple and to be honest I cannot imagine life without him. Neither of us can help how we feel about each other, we fell in love.

Incestuous relationships are not just about having sex, rather they're about expressing family and romantic love in the context of a sexual relationship. It is something that people outside of our community have great difficulty in understanding. You say it's not something to be proud of, well I can certainly say it's nothing to be ashamed of. To me it is a part of who I am, and I know that I am a good human being who does the best I can by everyone and avoid hurting people. My unusual sexual preference has not made me a bad person therefore there is no reason for me to feel ashamed.

A relationship isn't automatically wrong just because two people have a lot of DNA in common, just as it isn't automatically wrong because two people are the same gender. There wasn't anything wrong with the gay rights movement, and there isn't anything wrong with what I'm doing, paving the way for the incestuous rights movement. What I am doing is showing who we are as a minority group so that people are aware of our side of the story and so they know something about us.

Being exposed to the idea of incest as a relationship choice will not pollute childrens minds, instead it would remove the stigma for those teens growing up who have incestuous tendencies. Trust me I know what I'm talking about here, I grew up thinking I was alone in having these desires (I knew full well what my sexuality was from puberty onwards... just like how gay people know that they are gay from a similar time), and for the incestuous teen that is a very lonely place to be.

Allow me so briefly share my experience. It was only when I got into my late teens that sexual tension began to build between me and my dad. I thought it was just wishful thinking on my part at first, we were getting so emotionally close, so comfortable with each other. Truth is we were falling in love and we were both in denial for a time. Then a while after I turned 19 things really began to change, that first time we made love I just knew he was the one person I wanted to be with. That day it wasn't just our bodies we shared for the first time, but our whole hearts and souls.

It was after we had become fully blown lovers that I began my search on the Internet for other incestuous people. Finding online communities, others with whom I could share my personal experience with and hear theirs... knowing and even FEELING how we all understood each other, the unspoken bond that runs between us all... I was home. Finally I had peace knowing that not only was I not a freak, I was actually very normal.

It is important to me that the stigma against incestuous relationships be removed. I don't want generations after generations of incestuous people growing up believing that they are abnormal freaks and having the misplaced guilt that I did for so long. I want those people to grow up being okay with who they are, not having to hide their natural self, not to be afraid there is something wrong with them when there isn't. I do what I do online because I am lobbying for tolerance and understanding. People only fear our community because of media fueled prejudice and ignorance. Remove the ignorance, remove the fear.

For me being in an incestuous relationship been a very beautiful and fullfilling experience and I wouldn't change my sexuality even if I could. I'm at peace with who and what I am. Dad is my life partner, my first real love. We do everything together and our relationship is even stronger now than it was when our relationship began. We're pretty much inseperable, and still very much in love.

I realize that in this post I have shared a lot of information, basically I have given you my story. I've done so in order to try to connect to you as a fellow human being. You can hate me if you want to, that's your God given right, but I won't return that hate because I know you're experiencing a gut reaction reinforced by ignorance and prejudice.

This is a very good piece of writing 'Daughteruk'. Your essay on this delicate issue is highly appreciated!! Believe me, you have made a friend here straight away.You mustn't stop getting your point across!! l wait for your second piece of writing!!

Thank you for your kind comment. You can find my second piece by clicking on my username and viewing all posts made by me. Click on the post called 'the incest tree part 2'. That article was aimed at the regulars on my forum and it is about our responsibilities and the problems we face within the mainstream incest forums on the internet. Actually that article was written before this one. I hope you enjoy it.

Wow I googled "I want to have incest" and found your post. I love the post good job. Glad to see I'm not alone haha. I would love to join the little group you talk of.

No Kenny, you are not alone, in fact far from it. There are lots of us. I'm currently bringing the genuine community onto my forum because most of us are still on the mainstream incest sites amongst braindead idiots and fetishists (which btw annoy the hell out of me and make our people look stupid)... uniting us and bringing us out of an online diasporia. You never need to feel alone again.

You can find my website by googling 'daughteruksworld', it's a 'myfreeforum' forum. On there you'll meet our online brothers and sisters and feel free to share your feelings (and your story if you too have a special family member in your life ) without anyone passing judgement on you. We're a friendly bunch and my site is mostly for serious discussions but we can have fun too.

take care,
DaughterUK

[hornybro]

why are people so closed minded of what they don't understand instead of respecting the wishes of others. With all the negativity in the world and real issues at hand and there are some who are loving a family in a special way and we are called worse that those who take another's life. Open your mind and you will see where we are coming from.

[DaughterUK]

Originally Posted by hornybro

why are people so closed minded of what they don't understand instead of respecting the wishes of others. With all the negativity in the world and real issues at hand and there are some who are loving a family in a special way and we are called worse that those who take another's life. Open your mind and you will see where we are coming from.

The truth is that the overwhelming majority of the population have never had these feelings towards a family member, as a matter of fact quite a significant proportion of the population find the idea of sexual contact with their family members icky to say the least. That gut reaction is hardwired into most people, it's natures way of preventing inbreeding... just the same as nature made most people heterosexual so that the human race did not die out. So those people who are hating, it is because they are unable to understand the fact that we, for whatever reason, do not share their aversion to incest.

Human sexuality is not a simple one size fits all. Though most people are undoubtedly heterosexual and non-incestuous, there have always been deviations from the norm. Incest is one such deviation. The trouble we have is convincing the general public that although our sexual preference is atypical, we are not detrimental either to ourselves or to society.

It is easy for us to say 'just accept us you closed-minded haters', but we have to remember that we have to tackle the underlying cause of the hate, that being the lack of education surrounding the issue, the emotional charge, and bad public relations.

People currently don't have a clue as to the issues involved with incestuous relationships... that is unless the issue directly effects them. They do not understand what it is like to fall in love with a family member, and they do not understand the emotional rollercoaster involved when that love is acted on. They have never experienced that and so their mind boggles trying to imagine it. They can't understand that for us it feels so right.

I, like many incestuous people, have had non-incestuous relationships as well. None of those relationships have felt quite right, they've never been quite so deep or fulfilling. One has come close, but that was with another member of the community and he has remained a dear friend since. It feels most natural to me to be with my dad, he is my everything, he's my dad and he is the man who won my heart. I know I will never love another as I love him, nobody else could come close. My story seems to be repeated hundreds of times with so many I've spoken to.

Just please try to bear with the haters and know that you're never alone for as long as you have an internet connection, there will always be brothers and sisters out there to listen to you and understand you. Hold onto the love you give and receive, know that it is good and pure and that nobody can take such a beautiful feeling from you.

[Goodteacher]

As I said in your other posts, there is nothing good about incest. those who enjoy incest allow their pleasures to rule their thinking faculties (reason). There is no happiness in incest just sexual dooms.

In my country Morocco incest is punishable by law. Those who commit incest are condemned to death or life imprisonment. Incest doesn't affect just the people involved but the entire human race so in that sense, those who commit incest should be condemned to death or life imprisonment in order not to corrupt the human race.